The TVT crew took time out of their (busy?) schedules to check out the latest gadgets, blow up dolls and sex pillz presented at the AVN Expo in Las Vegas. It’s a HARD job, but someone has to DO IT, right?

Producer Jason Stein provided this profound take on some of the real dolls that he had the pleasure of observing at the Expo: “They were very life-like. I wouldn’t even call them dolls. They were people.” 

Wow, that’s deep man.

But, “people dolls” aside, another exhibit which caught the crew’s attention was the “Sex Pillz” booth, with freesexpillz.com rep, Matt Long, in charge. Mr. Long is not a porn performer, he’s just an awesome guy, with (an even more awesome last name), who is passionate about his sex pillz.

Shapiro started the conversation by bringing up the main concern that may be holding people back from trying sex pillz: “If I take these pillz, is something going to happen to me?” Shapiro even pointed out how Lamar Odom claimed to be taking “sexual enhancements” when he was found unconscious at the Love Ranch brothel.

Mr. Long kept calm and assured TVT fans there’s really nothing to fear about his sex pillz: “They are made in America, they are all natural, and they’ve been around for a long time.”

Mr. Long then broke down all the variations of pillz you can explore. The “Magic Mike Hot” pink pills are designed to be “Viagra for women.” He described them as an “exciter,” which can help with increasing “secretions.” 

The “Sweet & 69” pillz, which can be used by both sexes, can help make secretions taste “fruitier.” The Niagra pill is known as a “load volumizer.” This can come in handy for both male and female porn stars, who either want to squirt, or impress fans with their voluminous load. Amateurs can also join in on the fun.

The pillz can work within an hour of taking them. Mr. Long stated they were selling like hot cakes at the AVN expo, and his clientele included gay couples, straight couples, porn stars, single women and businessmen in suits.

Shapiro again pointed out that people may find it worrisome to take pillz that are sold online. He read off some of the ingredients, which sounded a bit like party favors that can make you have a “spiritual” experience at Coachella: “Indian corn pollen, mushroom spores, and juniper bark extract.” 

Mr. Long again assured the TVT audience that, to his knowledge, no one has ever died or gotten sick from his pillz. But, he also urged the public to act reasonably and with caution: “You can’t pop 20 pillz. You take one per day, and then drink a lot of water. It has similar ingredients to Viagra, just all natural.” 

Mr. Long couldn’t confirm that the pillz are FDA approved, but he seemed to put all concern to rest, when he admitted that he puts his money where his mouth is (literally) and takes the pillz himself. Even with high blood pressure problems, he’s never had any adverse effects.

JD Sharp chimed in that he and his wife may consider taking the pillz to spice things up. Mr. Long assured Sharp he will not be disappointed, because the pillz actually work: “You can’t be in business for a long time if you have a product that doesn’t work. We also sell “Extenze” which has been endorsed by Ron Jeremy for a very long time.” 

To get your sex pillz, Mr. Long advised to go to freesexpillz.com. You’ll need to create a profile to get your one free pill every month. But Mr. Long hopes you keep coming, and coming back for more: “Hopefully, you’re having sex more than once per month, so you’ll actually want to buy more of our product.” 

Mr. Long refrained from asking the TVT crew if they have sex more than once per month, and we can see why. Sharp is married, Jason Stein admitted he thinks “dolls are like people” and then Shapiro shared that he once bought a blow up doll once because “an ex made me do it.” Yeah sure, buddy. 

It may be time to buy some sex pillz and leave the dolls alone.

The Vegas Take Editor

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